Imagine Seeing Everyone with Fresh Eyes, Without Past Baggage.
Imagine Seeing everyone with Fresh Eyes, especially the people you knew in school. I had a dynamic dream of being at a party with all my high school fellow students. First of all, instead of the usual Reunion attitude of ‘I have nothing to say to these people’, I engaged them as the adults they were. I asked them about themselves. We laughed, talked of trips, careers, and family. Also, they were like new souls without a history with me, and they were fun. Leaving all baggage of the teen years behind, allowed me to see them in a new way, in my dream. It’s like meeting an interesting stranger at a party for the first time. It was an eye opening dream.
Why are high school memories, and our teen personalities, burned so deeply within our memories? The music still haunts my brain and takes me back to the cafeteria, parties, and dances. Furthermore, why do I revert back to my introvert self with these people? I’ve lived an interesting life, had a satisfying career, created a wonderful family, and established myself as a working artist.
Consequently, I’ve read that the strongest memories come from the events we’ve experienced from the ages of 10-30, since every interaction tells us to pay attention. Primitive Brain says to Survive, one must be accepted, popular, and desirable. So my brain was telling me this is important feedback to who I am becoming. Listen carefully, it said, and hold it in your body forever because there were major life skills on the line. Also, I was learning who to trust, who is my ally, and who to avoid. My life depended upon it.
So I can imagine seeing everyone with fresh eyes, talking, laughing, and enjoying myself as I joined the group. The reality is that I’ve stopped going to reunions. Comparisons are no longer a measure of my personal worth. Additionally, I can gauge my strengths from a lifetime of roller coaster ups and downs. Dreams are wonderful for sorting things out. But knowing all this, does encourage me to make the effort for the next one, maybe.
Now here’s the trick. Imagine seeing everyone with fresh eyes in your life today, especially your family. Rather than the usual, attempt to arrive with amnesia to every past confrontation, political opinion, and disrespect. Bring a clean slate to the table and keep the knee jerk reaction of childhood memories out of the picture. As a result, find redemption by knowing and showing you’ve found happiness, are a good person, and any resemblance to a remembered relative isn’t you anymore. Give kindness, love, and respect as though meeting each one for the first time. In conclusion, gathering with relatives gives you the chance for self-reflection, for a retrospective of how far you have come, and an appreciation for all you have.
More Reunion thoughts and emotions here and high school memories here. Remember to check out our Journey to the Dreamtime monthly art classes here.
I love this! There’s a group of us from my high school class who get together monthly. I hadn’t participated for the last several months due to ‘past baggage’ but just a week ago I put on fresh eyes! I stepped out of my memories of these women – and had a great time! I made some warm, new friendships and am feeling grateful.
I would love to ‘reprint’ this article in The Inner Voice to inspire others! Thank you for potting words to this act of kindness one can do for oneself.
The same has happened to me again, online. Connecting with grammar school people this time. Amazing. So glad this worked for you. Please do use it.